Thursday, July 15, 2004


Last night's Landscape Architecture class was a bit of a wash. Three hours were wasted on learning how to draw straight lines, examining an engineer's scale, and appropriately mastering architectural lettering. Don't misunderstand the American Mastodon; learning how to letter like an architect, though incredibly easy, is something he has wished to do for a long time. It's just that the lessons covered could have easily been learned by glancing at a book, and would have taken a quarter of the time.

Oh well, there's always the field trip this weekend to the Huntington Gardens. Hopefully, somewhere in the midst of the heavily landscaped grounds, the Mastodon will find some tubers. Tubers. Don't you just love that word? Tubers. The American Mastodon sure does.


King Koopa said...

The American Mastodon was wise to ironically parody his love for tubers before others pounced on it. I for one was fully prepared to issue a blistering attack on the regularity of the tuber references. Your ass-covering parody has beat me to the proverbial punch. Still, it's not hard to understand the ubiquity of the word in the American Mastodon's blog. Besides being an essential component of a balanced mastodon diet, the only word that is more fun to say, type, and think about than tubers is "boobies". Tragically, the American Mastodon clearly has more experience with tubers than boobies.

Mathis said...

The American Mastodon wishes King Koopa to know that the 'Don has had plenty of experience fondling boobies, mostly through intimate interactions with Queen Koopa.

King Koopa said...

Duly noted. However, it is surprising to King Koopa that the American Mastodon is apparently unaware of the open relationship between the Queen and King Koopa. Because of the King's insatiable apetite for boobies and chasing tail, the Queen allows the King to swing. In turn, the King allows the Queen to pick up sidework to entertain herself while the King is away. While the Queen is a relatively fine piece of you-know-what, she's really nothing compared to the barely-legal you-know-what that the King's been tapping lately. And, since the American Mastodon has been stuck in the rut of tubers and more tubers, the King graciously offers the AM the scraps from his table. Plus, the Queen's been damaged goods ever since she lost a nipple in that hunting accident.

King Koopa said...

Besides that, your retort about Queen Koopa's boobies is one level away from making a joke about King Koopa's mama, or simply saying, "Your mom." Let's raise the level of discourse here AM.

And, before you do it, King Koopa does foresee you responding with exactly, "Your mom" in a sophmoric attempt at being snide. So, don't even try it...The King's always operating 3 moves ahead of you.

Mathis said...

Your mother. Two syllables, yo. In a nutshell, that's class.

King Koopa said...

You're right, that is class...hey, speaking of class, our exchanges have reminded me of old limerick I learned in english class a long time ago.

There once was a girl named Sue
She liked to flash boobies
and her cooter too

They call her a bit robotic
but when she lets them boobs sway
it’s nothing if not hypnotic

In a nutshell, you just got schooled