Thursday, January 05, 2006

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION

I haven't really set out to alter my life in any significant or precise ways this new year. However, in a more general sense, I would like to push myself to be a better, bigger man. "What's a bigger man," you ask? Well, a bigger man doesn't get mad at old people for being grumpy, pushy, hunched over, mean, and slow drivers. A bigger man doesn't mock people for being of a particular race. A bigger man doesn't kick dogs. A bigger man doesn't masturbate six times a day. And a bigger man doesn't make the easy joke when small-minded idiots say something stupid.

For instance, last year, when I wasn't such a big man, I would have tried to make fun of this. But it's a new year, I'm a bigger man and, in the end, it's just not worth it.


Pat Robertson, above, is not a person I have an opinion of, one way or the other, and whatever he says is not that important, in the grand scheme of things, so let's just ignore him.

3 comments:

Ofc. Krupke said...

I've made no such resolution. Pat Robertson is a poltroon.

Mathis said...

Pat Robertson is 1/8th Negro?

Trevor Jackson said...

Bravo, Mastodon. You can take the day off for that one.