Thursday, January 05, 2006


I haven't really set out to alter my life in any significant or precise ways this new year. However, in a more general sense, I would like to push myself to be a better, bigger man. "What's a bigger man," you ask? Well, a bigger man doesn't get mad at old people for being grumpy, pushy, hunched over, mean, and slow drivers. A bigger man doesn't mock people for being of a particular race. A bigger man doesn't kick dogs. A bigger man doesn't masturbate six times a day. And a bigger man doesn't make the easy joke when small-minded idiots say something stupid.

For instance, last year, when I wasn't such a big man, I would have tried to make fun of this. But it's a new year, I'm a bigger man and, in the end, it's just not worth it.

Pat Robertson, above, is not a person I have an opinion of, one way or the other, and whatever he says is not that important, in the grand scheme of things, so let's just ignore him.


Ofc. Krupke said...

I've made no such resolution. Pat Robertson is a poltroon.

Mathis said...

Pat Robertson is 1/8th Negro?

Trevor Jackson said...

Bravo, Mastodon. You can take the day off for that one.