Monday, June 21, 2004


Compared to modern elephants, mastodons were squat and long in the body. Often vestigial tusks were present in their lower jaws.

This weekend the American Mastodon will be lending his talents to and participating in a local film festival. Apparently, films are to made in 48 hours and then screened for all participants to see.

The American Mastodon, a free-roaming mammal, is excited for the opportunity and hopes that the judges will enjoy his team's film. Preferably, the American Mastodon would like to convince his teammates to create a documentary on expanding human building developments and their effects on the natural habitat, and the continual depletion of endangered species due to poaching and lax hunting restrictions. Although it is a peaceful creature, the Mastodon is able to hold quite a grudge. He does appreciate going extint at the hands of pre-historic man.

However, if his team chooses instead to craft a heartwarming romantic comedy, ironic mockumentary, or action-packed buddy pic, the American Mastodon will happily dive in tusks first. With his large size and agile snout, he is a tremendous microphone boom operator.

Shoulder height varied from about 2 m to 2.6 m. Hair was coarse and reddish brown.

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